Gimme more. That’s the title of Britney’s comeback song and that’s exactly what she should have said to her costume designer on the subject of fabric. Hel-lo: knee-high boots, fishnets, sequinned bra and matching knickers is hardly the best look for a woman with a well-documented penchant for Cheetohs, Taco Bell and endless boozing. Even if those disgusting lollipops she’s always sucking on are supposed to be a weight loss aid.

But I digress. I couldn’t care less about Brit Brit’s belly if only it was covered. When it’s spilling over the top of her panties – as the Americans so cringe-making-ly say – at a globally televised event, well, that’s when it’s fair game. The scene of this sartorial travesty was her opening performance at the MTV Video Music Awards in Las Vegas last week. Not bargain night at the local stripparama where she would have looked more at home.

Such a shame. With the right outfit – and performance, it’s not entirely about the glad rags I concede – she could have instantly silenced her many critics. But no, she had to go and channel Demi Moore in Striptease.

Why is it when some women think sexy, they automatically think cheap, trashy and entirely unflattering? Imagine if Britney had taken another age-old fashion cliché for a spin instead. One that did tame her tum.

A black le smoking, perhaps? At least then she could have worn a trilby to hide her hideous weave. A slightly school-m’am-ish white shirt over slinky black satin corset and pencil skirt? Sizzling with nerdy frames and bit of bodice bearing a la Nicole Kidman on the cover of Vanity Fair this month. Even a Marilyn-via-Madonna combo of gown and opera length gloves would have been better.

That’s where performers like Gwen Stefani and Kylie – both known for their saucy stage get up – usually get it right. Cheeky and playful, they’re never mistaken for drunken strippers. And they don’t leave their dress success to chance, strutting their stages in Gucci, Dolce & Gabbana, Vivienne Westwood among others.

So with the party season looming there’s a lesson for us all: more actually is more.